Saturday, June 5, 2010

Bloated Frat Boy Riding the Wave of Past Accomplishment


When Sigourney got back from the women's washroon, Jay noticed she was now wearing black lipstick and he did'nt say anything. He could tell Sigourney was trying to play off she wasnt aware of herself even though she put accidentally indirect direct emphasis on everything she did in front of Jay.

"Sounds like someone is a bit bitter towards their peers." said Sigourney as she twitched her nose so that some of the cocaine caught inside could become dislodged and enter her blood stream.

To Jason, her statement simply illustrated Sigourney's ignorance- it reminded Jason how much younger and inexperienced she really was.

Even though the way she said it exuded an aura of feminine wisdom ,Sigourney could not have been more incorrect. As if her air of objective observation as the onlooker from the side lines was keen enough to dispel Jason Lee's cynicism of the entire skateboarding industry.

No matter how valid Jason's statements were, Sigourney still insisted on pushing for the other side.

Sigourney automatically assigning herself as Devil's advocate reminded Jason that she was such an opposing force, an opposition that was there to create a necessary tension- a knee jerk check and balance.

With each counter point she gave, Jason became more frustrated. The buzz from the frustration began to overpower the buzz from the coke, the buzz from the gin.

Jason was forced to dig deeper into his bag of tricks. More anecdotes, more true stories, more writhing examples of moral decay.

"Look, Ill simplify what I'm saying so you can understand, Sigourney." said Jay back to her like an amusing piece of food between his teeth, "If skateboarding was Jesus- insert name here- Rob Dyrdek, Tony Hawk, Bam Magera- would be Judas Escariot."

"You sound like you're being a bit overly dramatic. I like the Dyrdek's show- he's funny- a funny guy. He certainly seems like he knows how to enjoy himself, how to have a good time. Which is more than I can say for some retired proboarders I know. And what I get from it is that Dydek is a skateboarder, but he doesn't necesarily let it dominate his life. He doesn't dress like a skatebaorder, hes a normal guy. Maybe Rob is saying that normal people can be skateboarders too- it's not just the realm for jaded hipsters. Don't you think its better more kids are out there exercising?"

"Sure, more kids are skateboarding but a lot has been lost! Besides,Rob Dyrdek is nothing but a bloated frat boy riding the wave of past accomplishment.Yeah sure, when he was fourteen his part in Memory Screen actually articulated some sort of indy template. But since then all of that work has been unraveled- canceled out by the Maxin Magazine bachelor image, the diamond tattoos on his wrists, the horrible skit before his DC part. Sure, now more kids have been exposed to skateboarding, but its just diluted the pond- it's made skateboarding sanitized. Theres so many kids out these days that trick selection pretty much means nothing. Switch means nothing. Skateboarders used to be outlaws. You're not supposed to wear a helmet! Skateboarding used to be something else."

"You wanting to keep skateboarding exclusive makes you seem like the fratboy,Jason. Don't you think?" said Sigourney as she sucked the remaining ice left over from her overly alcoholed Cosmo.

Sigourneys statement made Jason feel half defeated. There was no convincing her, she was obviously a very strong willed woman. Jason could feel his first anticline from the coke and needed to bump up fast.

Jason fingered the silver vial in his jacket pocket for assurance.

Jason continued, "Lets go to the bathroom and then get out of here."


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Houston, Texas
Be kind, because everyone you'll ever meet is fighting a hard battle.